10 Random Poker Quotes

• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Fold and live to fold again