10 Random Poker Quotes

• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• Those eggs smell delicious!
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." --Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
• I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."