10 Random Poker Quotes

• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• In order to live, you must be willing to die - Amir Vahedi
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"