10 Random Poker Quotes

• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.