10 Random Poker Quotes

• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• When you win... Rub it in!!! When you lose.. Drink the booze!!!!! Los Altos Dirt Bikers
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"