10 Random Poker Quotes

• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• Darwin takes a toll on the worst poker players because they lose money, Darwin takes a toll on average poker players because they don't make money and they will never be a great poker players, Darwin takes the greatest toll though, on the greatest poker players, because they could be doing something greater.
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.