10 Random Poker Quotes
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More Random Quotes- When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
- Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
- How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
- (after a particularly bad beat)
"that was a terrible call"
"it's called gambling"
"no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
- I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
- "If i dont make that final table, nobody's gonna remember me next year. If i do make that final table, Im a poker legend overnight" - Dutch Boyd 2003 WSOP Main Event
- "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." --Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
- If you can't spot the sucker at the table, guess what..
- "What've you got, Layne?"
"You BEAT."
Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow.
$ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day
2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic
Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
- If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.