10 Random Poker Quotes

• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."