10 Random Poker Quotes

• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson