10 Random Poker Quotes

• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "If i dont make that final table, nobody's gonna remember me next year. If i do make that final table, Im a poker legend overnight" - Dutch Boyd 2003 WSOP Main Event
• "Never go broke in an unraised pot" -T.J. Cloutier
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Kiddie games down the street! -- mike matusow