10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."