10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• "I'd rather be lucky than good" - Lefty Gomez
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.