10 Random Poker Quotes

• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• The all-in play works everytime but once.
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.