10 Random Poker Quotes

• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.