10 Random Poker Quotes

• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• I'd rather be good than lucky, I'd rather be lucky than lose...
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"