10 Random Poker Quotes

• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!