10 Random Poker Quotes

• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• I'd rather be good than lucky, I'd rather be lucky than lose...
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe