10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'