10 Random Poker Quotes

• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• when you win its got to make a difference when you lose its got to hurt.
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain