10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• I'm a better poker player than I am a player. -RedGrant
• You can't let it get you down when somebody knocks you out of a tournament playing a hand they shouldn't have played. Without these types of players, nobody would win any amount of money, so sometimes you just have to take your medicine. - T.J. Cloutier, Championship Omaha
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• Fish don't eat Nutz!