10 Random Poker Quotes

• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• " The commonest mistake in history is underestimating your opponent; happens at the poker table all the time."
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• im going to 2 out you to death