10 Random Poker Quotes

• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• when you win its got to make a difference when you lose its got to hurt.
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.