10 Random Poker Quotes

• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986