10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• When you win... Rub it in!!! When you lose.. Drink the booze!!!!! Los Altos Dirt Bikers
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• The next best thing to playing and winning is playing and losing. --Nick the Greek