10 Random Poker Quotes

• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts