10 Random Poker Quotes

• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• Where's the buffet? -Doyle Brunson
• Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher. -Amarillo Slim
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson