10 Random Poker Quotes

• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• "you got to know when to holdem, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run..."
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed