10 Random Poker Quotes

• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "Give me running 10's boy!!" Mike Laing - after CALLING 78K with 10-8 on a board of K22
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson