10 Random Poker Quotes

• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.