10 Random Poker Quotes

• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Where's the buffet? -Doyle Brunson
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it