10 Random Poker Quotes

• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• "In low limit hold em' deception plays a less significant role. Either someone is already looking at that hand or will call out of curiousity." ---Lee Jones
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• Fook the floosh droo!
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth