10 Random Poker Quotes

• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."