10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• Darwin takes a toll on the worst poker players because they lose money, Darwin takes a toll on average poker players because they don't make money and they will never be a great poker players, Darwin takes the greatest toll though, on the greatest poker players, because they could be doing something greater.
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.