10 Random Poker Quotes

• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)