10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• I'd rather be good than lucky, I'd rather be lucky than lose...
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders