10 Random Poker Quotes

• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• "I dont mind getting beaten by a good player, and I dont even mind getting beaten by a bad player, but I cant stand getting beaten by a bad player who thinks he is good." H.L.B. Tunica, MS
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.