10 Random Poker Quotes

• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• Poker is for loners.
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]