10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• "I could make a crazy call on you..." Sammy Farhah to Chris Moneymaker at the final table when Moneymaker went all in.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• "Oh give me a break, Ace-eight! I guess some people like getting their money in as a 3-to-1 underdog." -Phil Hellmuth, at the 2004 WSOP