10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom