10 Random Poker Quotes

• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• Poker - love the pain or play checkers. - MoeSyzslak
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"