10 Random Poker Quotes

• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• "I had 2 high." -Sammy Farha
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."