10 Random Poker Quotes

• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• There is less luck involved than a bad player thinks there is, and there more luck involved than a good player will admit there is
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• Fold and live to fold again
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.