10 Random Poker Quotes

• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• The all-in play works everytime but once.
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.