10 Random Poker Quotes

• Welcome to kicker school
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
• "you got to know when to holdem, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run..."
• "What've you got, Layne?" "You BEAT." Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow. $ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day 2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.