10 Random Poker Quotes

• Fold and live to fold again
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "I'd rather be lucky than good" - Lefty Gomez