10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• Acey Deucy Never Leucy --Phil Hellmuth
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• The all-in play works everytime but once.