10 Random Poker Quotes

• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "I'd rather be lucky than good" - Lefty Gomez
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.