10 Random Poker Quotes

• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• Fook the floosh droo!
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph