10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.