10 Random Poker Quotes

• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• if u play for the thrill u are ill
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.